Muda.INC

Grazed Lessons

2008-11-08T22:16:00.005+11:00

Today I fell....

I tumbled from a straight road.

As I started cascading onto the concrete slab, I wondered what on earth was happening..One minute the road was smoothand I was pushing toward the goal..the finish line..running the race to finish strong,

the next minute I'm tumbling down?

As I tumbled, crashed and fell, ipod in tow, I noticed that those closeby did not offer support, did not offer help.

As I recovered from this tumble,

I looked at my clothes, grassy but not torn,

dirty, but not disheveled ..only my knee bore the scar of this event

a reminder that this had happened.....

But that's all it was, a marking that something had occured..

After much hesitation, I decided to get up...

I realised I needed to finish this race...

I needed to finish strong, sure enough I had a scar but should that stop me from finishing strong?

From finishing at all?...

Yes, although I had this wound,

Although I was bleeding, dirty and disheveled

I could finish still Finish!

This was only a minor setback which would only cause me to take step back if I let it!

You, helped me grow from this Grazed Lesson..

Grazed Lessons...Winners Never Quit & Quitters Never Win!

Guess Who's Back..

2008-11-08T22:06:00.001+11:00

So I'm back..new look blog, and hopefully better posts than the last time...

Something New...

2006-11-04T16:12:00.000+11:00

Now this post is for Radiah...well and all those Simon Baker and Sanaa Lathan fans..

Firstly, Simon Baker, my gash, my gash, my gash. This man has been carved by the hands of God, what can I say!! He is HOTTT!!

Ok enough drooling over Simon Baker...........

The basic plot of the movie is 'Letting go and Letting love Flow!'Making yourself open and available to the opportunities that present themselves. Watching this movie, I saw myself somehow as Sanaa Lathan in the future, being all successful having yourself set, your own place, a great position in a great firm (which would be mine of course), but yeah, very successful. But alas, she had no man by her side to share in the joys of life. Then, Brian Kelly (Simon Baker) comes along and mann does he change Kenya McQueen's (Sanaa Lathan)life, He shows her what it means to truly be herself. Making herself available to enjoy life and to fall in love with a man who would not have been her traditional pick, because he is white and she is black.

Some may think this movie is just about opening yourself to the possibilities of an interacial relationship, which is true to an extent but I think above it all it aims to encourage people to LIVE, to not be too busy that you let life happen to you and YoU don't happen to life!! Meeting Brian makes Kenya realise what she has been missing out in life, the opportunity to be herself, to be with someone not just based on their achievements and what other people say but based on how he makes her live life, and live it to the fullest!!

The movie is highly enlightening with some interesting scenes regarding what not to say about a black womans hair..or before I get corrected her weave. Look some of us just cannot go au natural, trust me.There is a whole lot of what we call black woman drama which is tres hilarious!!Definately a must to watch!!

I must say watching the movie has also made me open to the possibilities of 'skiing the slopes', I've always thought I wouldn't end up with someone of my own culture but this movie opened me up to think, I really wouldn't mind going black, white, arab or asian (ask me which type). So, instead of having a list down to the last hair on his body..I shall let go..and let FLOW!!

The Campaign..for Real Beauty

2006-09-23T01:37:00.000+10:00

What is REAL BEAUTY is it in the clothes you wear, the makeup you apply,the magazines you read or is it something that everyone has missed, is it tangible. Does it change from generation to generation, culture to culture? Who defined what real beauty really is...

Who set the status quo of a perfect size ten or six, who said long hair, blonde, black, brunette, is the way to go and everyone seems to jump on the same bandwagon. Have we not let ourselves be infiltrated by someone’s ideology of what real beauty truly is and should be? Why do most women not think they are matching up, why is there so much activity in the'beauty camp' where everyone is training to be the same, clones subject to their own destruction. Why is a women's voluptuity (my own making of a word) not celebrated anymore, the zenith of creation is subject to the status quo.

In order to achieve the epitome of real beauty I think women need to start writing their own script on what true beauty really is, forget what has been said, what hasn't been said and delve into the core of You, the woman who knows she is truly worthit..the woman who is Truly Beautiful..

Beauty is an Attitude that comes from within; from an optimism and Belief in Life -Rita Barros!!

So Go on....Campaign for Real Beauty...Viva La revolution!!

Celebrate who You Are!

Possibilities...!!!

2006-09-22T23:48:00.000+10:00

'Have you kept yourself in a Box all your life, only to end up in one at the end of it?'

This post right here is inspired by the movie, Last Holiday starring Queen Latifah and LL Cool J. The movie actually got me thinking about the things in this life that we only set as possibilites and never actually do them!

I've heard it said 'when was the last time you did something for the first time?'. What are the things that you may be limiting yourself to because you hope of having a tomorrow, a next month, year or age, when you will do it. Who knows if today is not the last day of your life?

For me possibilites, well the things I have been growing in love for are my Food, my goodness, I love exploring new tastes, Melbourne my people offers so much of this and it don't have to be costly, I love cooking, making different foods, experimenting and enhancing my abilities, and you know the most amazing feeling ever is when you try a recepie and it comes out like the picture, it's like mann the epitome of feeling successful!

Other possibilities which shall become realities in time obviously due to financial and educational constraints at present include my increasing desire to travel and discover new places and peoples. One Place that I would absolutely love to visit is Venice, mann there is something so enchanting about that place, unexplainable. Should the Almighty bless me in the near future I would love the privilege and honour of being an amazing wife , mother and leader in the field of procurement.

The above stated are but a few of the possibilites at present that I would love to explore and as I grow these Possibilites shall grow as well.

So to you reading I say, Live each day....Make it the day of Endless Realities!

The Day the World Changed..

2006-09-18T23:51:00.000+10:00

America Remembers.....nah correction the World Remembers!! Last week marked the 5 year anniversary of September 11, the attack on the supposed superpower of the world.I remember thinking to myself when the terrorist attacks occured that ah well, this really doesn't affect me, nobody would ever want to bomb Zimbabwe or any other African country for that fact, so this occurence in America would not change my life.

It's so weird how those events 5 years ago, all seem like a movie now, when I was reading the 9/11 Commission Report and watching the various documentaries arranged to commemorate these attack, I must say the whole plot read like an intricately arranged and directed movie, the whole attack was so carefully planned out,and executed like it was a perfect world, because as we all know, movies depict a seemingly perfect world where outside factors do not reign. Such as how the terrorists got into America, got visas, got through customs, mann it seemed so easy, the way they were even trained to fly by Americans....man the scene was set and nothing was impossible, they could 'just do it'!

Osama Bin Laden has been rendered by some to be a history maker, thereby that would place him in the league of other such men and women who are remebered in the past for their expoits whether good or bad. Is Osama going to be the man our children learn about in history one day when they are learning of other greats...? Well correction it just won't be our children, infact we are, well at least I know I am, in every single subject learning about the effect terrorism has on trade, and the lowering of barriers to trade. We have to factor in delays that occur when containers are being cleared through customs as they 'apparently' check each and every container. Even the world of the infamous just in time has been changed, car manufacturers such as Chrysler had to deal with setbacks in manufacturing as most airports were closed after September 11, and they could not get certain parts for their car assemblies, thereby costing them millions of dollars. Now all I'm taught about or what is emphasised in my course is the ability to make contingencies, using Pareto's 80/20 law, we need to cater for such occerances, through disaster recovery plans! How interesting is that!1

September 11, has definately changed the world, we all seem to live in fear now, well some people do, due to the possible attacks that can occur with those countries that have aligned themselves to America.

So, what for you has changed since September 11, apart from the fact that if you are an 80's child you have probably lived through three wars already, death is somewhat just a statistic for you, and the value of a life has been devalued through the endless statistics we are exposed to, somehow 22 people dying in Victoria in 22 days seems so small compared to the thousands that have died in the wars for and against terror...

Goodbye Carolita...

2006-08-31T00:29:00.000+10:00

1. Ndu, Carolia, and I

So yes, this blog has taken AGES to be posted, but the one to whom it is being posted for knows why this is the case!!! So Carolita, departed from Melbourne on August 31, 2006. Wow, who would've thought I would see more of Melaz than I had in the few years that I had been here..We visted many places Carolita, the crew and I.

2. Marina, Radiah, Carol and I

This special young lady, who is getting some post space on my blog hehehe, taught me quite a bit while she was here, especially living with her for like two weeks. Ok, we all know I am a fussy fusspot, so no confession required, but I realised this way of life that I am so used to can have both positive and negative effects, especially when there are others to be considered. Carolita showed me these negative effects and I must say our time together was not always rosy, but it was journey meant to be definately taken...

I love you Carolita, thanks for gracing me with your presence, it was different having a roomate but it was good. Now everytime I watch the Great wall of China advert, I think of you and laugh....C'est tres hilarious!! By the way if you really want to know why the wall was built, follow this link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_great_wall_of_china

3. Nyasha, Dorica, Carolita and I

New Millenium!!!

2006-08-20T07:56:00.000+10:00

ViVa Le 21st Century..Viva La Nouveau MIlllenium...

The Time has finally arrived!!

Missing YOU..

2006-08-19T01:36:00.000+10:00

I miss friendships in the past,
friends who I knew intimately,
who knew me intimately,
Friends that were always there,
to cry with, to walk with, to laugh with
to dream of exploits with.
Is it not sad when things change and we go our
separate ways, the ways far from where we began?
I miss You...

To all my friends overseas, I love you and miss you heaps and heaps

Fussy Fusspot..

2006-08-19T00:41:00.000+10:00

Firstly, I wonder how many people will actually answer this question.. How many of you out there think Tatenda is a Fussy Fusspot..? Well, a certain Young lady pointed out to me this week that I am very PARTICULAR, certain things not bothering other individuals actually bother me.

The funny thing is I had never actaully thought of myself as Particular, I mean I like having things orderly, or perfect as others would like to think, but to be honest I cannot stand a messy living space, especially when I want to do some serious studiyng etc etc..

But anyway, c'est la vie....

ELevate....

2006-08-19T00:29:00.000+10:00

"Lift"

I know you're hurting
Feels like you're learning
'Bout life the hard way
And it ain't working
Seems like forever
That you've been falling
It's time to move on
You're life is calling, yeah
This was never meant to be the end
Close the book and start again
Cause I know how hard it can get
But you gotta lift
You gotta lift
And sometimes that's how it is
But I know you're stronger
Stronger than this
You gotta lift - Shannon Noll

Good morning ladies and gentlemen, the time has finally come for an update yeah, well, the time has most certainly arrived to 'Lift" for me to go to another level, to elevate...I love the above lyrics, they speak so much to me of what I have been growing through in the Memoirs to Becoming Muda.Inc.

Being a minority is not always easy but the growing process and leaning experience is truly worthwile. For so long I have been 'upset' or 'disappointed' at the lack of certain individuals to care..but the truth is at the end of the day, it's me who is at fault, I have put an expectation on you to care..and after that expectation has not been fulfilled, bitterness, anger, has slowly edged its way forth and materialising in many different forms. So, this growing process although hurtful, and solitary, it is worthwile...I am LIfting,starting another book, my memoirs!

Time to Grow...

2006-08-19T00:26:00.000+10:00

Last night I tried but I couldn't sleep
Thoughts of you were in my head
I was lonely and I needed you next to me
Life is harder since you left
I never meant to do you wrong
And now all is said and done
I hope you won't be gone too long

Where do I go
What do I do
I can't deny I still feel something
And, I wish you could say you feel the same
You've broken the bond
I gotta move on
But how do I end this lonely feeling?
You've gone, I'm here, alone
I guess it's time to grow

I try to speak, but my words never catch the air
Like you never knew I was there
Take me back to the days when you really cared
Can we make love re-appear?
I can't go on the roads too long
And now all is said and done
I can't go forward if my heart's still where i'm coming from

Crying time is over
I know I can't control feelings
If you won't return, then I guess I'll be more than a woman
and move on

Though you've gone / And I'm here, alone
I guess it's time to grow

Courtesy of Lemar....yes, the time has definately come to accept the task at hand..to "Grow"

Friday Night Out...IMAX and Crown

2006-08-04T18:02:00.000+10:00

After almost three years in Melbourne I finally made my way to IMAX theatre, it was most certainly worth the wait, I had a superb time.

On my little escapade or should I say Carol’s escapade we were joined by Mmilidzi, Nyasha, Mesh, Radiah, and Dorica. The movie/documentary was rather interesting, apart from the idea of the fish coming too close to you hehehe, this effect even made others scream, twas rather enlightening, plus how all the fish/sea creatures all work together for one good, is really amazing!! After IMAX we made our way to Crown Casino, for some gambling hehehe... it was rather different I must say, I lost two bucks which was ok with me, I actually don’t get how people get addicted to gambling, coz the pokie machines are actually quite boring, all you do is just sit there and press one button, I guess people must either be really bored with nothing to do in this life, or just plain silly to spend loads of money on such a pastime.

Here are a few photos from the evening.

1. The Girls (left to right: Radiah, Carol, Dorica, Me, Nyasha and Mesh)

2. Mmilidzi, the main man

3. Radiah and I

4. The Funny 3D movie glasses

5. The other side of others hehehehe...

Dreaming Big

2006-08-01T00:05:00.000+10:00

Dreaming Big,
I do not surrender,
when the violent winds blow,
causing me to stagger and fall,

Dreaming Big,
I know I can make it
I know I will get there,
Using weakness as my strength
and failure as my catalyst.

Dreaming Big,
All these things come to pass
and I am certain of those things unseen...

I am Dreaming Big...

13/12/03

RMIT....gotta love it!

2006-07-31T23:07:00.000+10:00

Yeyeye..first week back and I felt so much pressure, let me try break it down for you as said by Dr Khan, 'Here at RMIT, there is no NEXT WEEK, we are running a 100m race, and if you're not with us, you are lagging behind and you will most certainly lose..'

So, how's that for an opening statement to a lecture, yeish, I love my uni, but man it is sooo much pressure, the workload seems to have intensified by 10. Never before in my entire RMIT career have I had to READ so much, and this isn't just textbooks, well not the prescribed ones, you gotta read journals and articles constantly, you have additional reading and reading meant to enhance your knowledge further reading...man tis dangerous!

So, I've been at it, so if this blog is not updated as much as it should be please forgive, my eyes, hands and brain are directed to the further advancement of my career. Above all, I must say although school is pressure it keeps me on my toes, mann you gotta be ON POINT, every waking minute you gotta use your time wisely!! I love my course and I am enjoying it, well the first week of it, I have really intellectual lecturers this semester so, no room for stuff ups hehehe, two of my lecturers are Doctors, with one having worked in the military so you can imagine what that would be like. The others are all professionals in the industries to which they belong, so mann the journey should be more than facinating, plus I also have a spanish tutor, that will be sooooooooo different, never had that one before.

Anyway enough of me and school, just wanted to update those that actually enjoy this blog, sometimes it is actually my escape..

Conitnually elevate...

The Journey..

2006-07-31T22:48:00.000+10:00

Circles...I must say, that blog title/poem was at a stage when I was having one of my lows, its been a while since I blogged anything so here goes..

I'm actually on a journey right now, others have travelled this path before me, and their advice I have received and appreciate sincerely. There are many things I must sort out in my life right now, mainly to do with who I am,who is walking with me into my destiny and who isn't, where I want to be, what is me, myself and I, interesting questions to be asking oneself at 21 years of age, but hey, better now than when I'm 40...hehehe

So, just to let you know, this journey is not always going to be highs or lows for me, I guess we will just wait anticipatedly to see where the road takes me, but I believe at the end of it, it shall all most certainly be worthwile..

Signing off....INFJ

Maybe he's just not that in to you...

2006-07-31T22:43:00.000+10:00

Maybe he's just not that into you...why do we women contest the reality of this statement, well book title actually, why do we endlessly call, communicate and try forge a relationship with someone who is just not that into us, we end up getting hurt at the end of it anyway. Maybe we just get attached too much and think certain moves he makes are signs that lead closer to him being sooo much into us!

Why, oh why do we cause ourselves so much hurt and pain...

if he aint into you..ditch him,

Signing off..the feminist advocate

Dreamers Anonymous..

2006-07-31T22:37:00.000+10:00

There's no doubt about it...I'm a dreamer, I dream of exploits far and wide, the question is what happens when those dreams you have seemingly perish right before your very eyes, every bit of their existence seemingly disintegrates just like a pill dissolving in water...what do you do then?

Circles.....

2006-07-16T23:31:00.000+10:00

Disturbed balance, supposedly purged before,
Encroaching and creeping on my entirety
Do I have anything to give?
Am I worth anything?
What makes me different…?
Am I seemingly invisible that no one can see this pain,
that ravishes me so?
Why am I different? Unlike the status quo
Inside I break, yet outside a façade protrudes
Like everything is in order…
Others have many talents, abilities far and wide,
Some are great dancers, singers, orators,
What do I posses...what do I have to give?
Do I have anything to give?
I am called Great, yet nothing inside me radiates greatness, more mediocrity,
Irrelevant, unkempt
It seems I just go round and round in a monotonous circle
Yesterday pains, remain today’s pains.
Question is will they be tomorrows pains…?
Will things ever change?...

The Road Traveled Before.....

2006-07-14T22:25:00.000+10:00

So, I find myself on familiar terrain and having tasted the sweet taste of success that is offered on the other more affluent side, I find myself really down, upset and seemingly downtrodden, so, the story goes, I failed my Management Accounting exam, and this result has even overshadowed my other marks.

The weird thing is I have failed at things before but this time it all seems so much harder to muster and swallow, getting up, although something that must be inevitably done appears to just be an echo of ‘true passion, forgets fear, overcomes fatigue and triumphs over all difficulties. I guess, I just keep asking God how come I always have to fail, it’s like you can taste success but let’s just stop you and start again. Having had achieved superb marks in my previous course, this new failure seems to just have messed everything up, I feel this failure is just going to stick out like a sore thumb on my transcript it aint serious and that it will have a major impact on my work placement opportunities.. I just don’t know!

Don’t get me wrong though, I don’t blame God for what happened, not at all, I just question how come some people go through life without ever failing at ANYTHING and for me, I seem to always have to fail, in order to achieve, I just don’t get it!!?? Why Tatenda, ok, I wouldn’t wish it on others but I just don’t understand why it’s gotta be me…. All I know is I’m travelling this road of familiar terrain before and getting up is not as easy as it was before, maybe it’s because I had tasted success, and now that’s all changed..

Wondefully Feminine.....

2006-07-01T13:49:00.000+10:00

So, this post has been along time coming.. What is wonderfully feminine? Well, apparently the heart of a woman is to be ‘romanced, to play an irreplaceable role in a shared adventure and possessing a beauty all of her own to unveil’. Thinking on this and throughout the explanation of these three factors I must admit I have come to concur wholeheartedly with this opinion….

‘To be romanced’…

Why do so many women love Bridget Jones Diary, particularly ‘The Edge of Reason’? Well, I guess we all seem to see ourselves as a Bridget Jones (well I know I can relate), she is the modern day woman, not your average model as she will typically be, ‘always just a bit fat, not your perfect woman who you will find in the VIP room and not have to change. Bridget Jones yearns for ‘someone who could muster the strength to Fight for her’, just as she is! And that is what we all want, and the fact that Bridget Jones with all her imperfections finally finds the man who will chase her suffices to give some of us a bit of hope.

So, it is true, women yearn for some sort of romance, it may not be traditionally romantic but we yearn to be pursued, to be chased, to become irreplaceable to someone else, to mean something to someone…to be loved. Even in me with all my ‘feminist’ proclamations I must admit I yearn for this, wondering when will it happen, how will it happen, Will it happen? Oh Father, please let it Happen!!

I will find you. No matter how long it takes, no matter how far – I will find you.
-Nathaniel to Cora in The Last of the Mohicans

To play an irreplaceable role in a Great Adventure…

‘We want to be Passionate, Powerful women not just safe, nice and sweet’.

Especially being an African woman the above statement is particularly true to me, I just don’t want to be a ‘mother and wife’, I want the total package, Wife, Mother and Leader and before people take this the wrong way I am in no way degrading other women who yearn for that alone, good on You that just aint me, I want it all, I want the adventure.

The adventure for me is having my own business, watching it grow and leaving behind an amazing legacy, the name for this blog Muda.Inc for some people may appear to be just a nickname, but for me, it is the beginning of a brand, a brand that will last for many years to come and the dreams of those who began it will be irreplaceable…that is what I yearn for, that is what excites me. That is my adventure, my great odyssey!

To be frank, I don’t see myself any other way. I want to be the type of woman walking into a boardroom of ALL MEN and being highly respected not only due to my right as a human being but due to the knowledge and expertise that I bring forth, especially as a woman!! So, that is my great adventure a Passionate, Powerful and tenacious woman!!

A beauty of her own to unveil….

I want to be beautiful
And make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart
And be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
I just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful
–Bethany Dillion, ‘Beautiful’

Lets face it, every day we are plagued by what ‘real beauty’ should be and to tell the truth it does get to us, seriously even as a christian woman, saved and redeemed, I find myself at times not happy with what I see before me, I want to be beautiful and sometimes I just don’t match up!! Why, is it we as women desire this beauty, why do we want it so bad, that we work our whole lives at aiming to be it, but we may never match up. I think this all roots back to every woman wanting to be romanced, wanting a beauty that someone will actually want, and that beauty we are all convinced is found in the latest fashion styles, the nicest hairstyles and the best body.

But, the question is …is this all true beauty or just a chasing after the wind…in order to unveil some sort of superficial beauty. Why do we want so much for someone to notice this outside beauty… are we not the ones who have caused this surge of the ‘Shallow Hals’ of our day and age just because of our own insecurities..?

We want beauty, a beauty that can be felt, a beauty that affects others, a beauty all our own to unveil…a beauty different from all others. A beauty that is simple, yet elegant..!!

We want to be a Jem above all Jewels..!!

Can I talk about it?

2006-06-24T23:45:00.000+10:00

Centuries of hurt, pain and disaster
Can I talk about it?
When hurt and anger erupts
When Milestones of memories
take the place of you..
Can I talk about it?
Can I get it off my chest?
Can I speak of it now
and let it all go....
I desire to let it go,
taking a leap and letting change come,
Can I talk about it?..

Muda.Inc 24 June,2006

Complaining....

2006-06-23T23:37:00.000+10:00

Complaining is defined as expressing pain or dissatisfaction of resentment

Why oh why do people do this? Surely if you do not like what is being done YOU should make the change as obviously the problem lies with you, coz at the end of the day complaining will get you NO WHERE, except possibly an increase in your blood pressure. Anyway this blog has been inspired and accelerated by watching the various programmes on TV such as 60 minutes and today tonight, seriously they are some, and I do specify some Australians who are ALWAYS complaining! The government isn’t doing this or that, the government should stop this or that, gosh people PLEASE why you always wanting the government to bail you out!!

Like tonight on 60 minutes other childcare owners were complaining about the childcare giant for ABC and how he in essence is so big and powerful no one wants to go against him, I must say the owner was quite ON POINT with the various questions that the reporter was trying to get, to catch him and get him to slip up, like his answer regarding how his company is not about the welfare of shareholders but about the welfare of the children, ok even I for a minute there was like but for real, we are always learning its about the shareholders in management accounting but he answered saying the shareholders know that the welfare of the children is the most important thing as it is the core of their business and focusing on that will make the shareholders in turn happy as the parents are satisfied…with that I was like COME THRU GUY!!

And then he was being called a bully and how he squashes competition, this was a complaint by his competitors who claim he has gone against them and is aiming at shutting their business down, but my take on this is, if you’re in the business world you got to realize competition will come against you and how you stand will make or break your business at the end of the day. So therefore the owner of ABC says he also went through the process of becoming great, it was not just an overnight sensation, he had to put in his blood, sweat, toil and tears over the years to achieve success, why do these other companies just want a quick fix…get with the PROGRAMME please!!

So basically I just think people should just stop complaining and expecting the government to change all the problems of society because at the end of their day that is not their priority, and that is another blog in itself..The role of the government!! Just learn to deal, if you are not going to do anything then stop COMPLAINING!!

Spontaneity

2006-06-17T23:10:00.000+10:00

Well, I usually don't do things on the spur of the moment, everything is usually planned and ordered for me, except my weird food cravings hehehe, so on June 17th, I packed my bag and headed off to Southern Cross Station where I was to board a train to Geelong!! Yes, people, that was definately a spontaneous move for me. I guess I figured why not? I've been in Victoria for almost 3 years and I have never been to Geelong, what's up with that!! So hopped onto the train and spent a day 'shopping' in Geelong with Miss Nyasha and Viriginia. Twas a great day just meeting new people and enjoying the ambience, that is Geelong!!It was a Miss Mushambi Junior would say, Je Ne sais Quoi!!!

I guess I have probably busted some people's ideaologies of me not being Spontaneous huh!?

So, when was the last time you did something, for the First Time!?

Award Night

2006-05-26T15:28:00.000+10:00

And if at first you don’t succeed
Then dust yourself off and try again
You can dust it off and try again, try again -Aaliya

The above lyrics from 'Try Again' by Aaliya are the story of my life..throughout High School when everyone else received awards for their academic excellence I never seemed to match up, although I put my all into all the work I did, I never seemed to achieve and as a result for most of my life I considered my myself a failure comparatively to my peers and siblings..

Now I know..Good things definately come to those who wait, who wait for them to come,no matter the time span, the obstacles that come your way, if at first you don't succeed, get up and try again!! On May 26,2006 this became a reality for me as I received the Hamburg Sud Award for the Best Graduating Student for International Trade, 2005. The whole event was so surreal for me, I cannot even begin to describe the emotion that flowed within me, I was sooooo happy.

So, you see, even if it takes 10 years to achieve that which you have been aiming for, it too shall come to pass in due time!!

True Passion, always forgets fear, Overcomes Fatigue and Triumphs over ALL difficulties!!

To all those who walked the journey of my life that led up to May 26, 2006. I thank you!! Your encouragement, support and strength I will treasure for the rest of my life. I love you all!!

A Few Photos from the event...

1. Award Presentation

2. The certificate

3. La Familia (Mmilidzi and Dorica)

4. Kylie Paterson-Jonas and I ( My International Trade Teacher)

5. Barry (Hamburg Sud Representative) and I

Inano

2006-05-24T16:22:00.000+10:00

My my how reliant I have become of this little gadget. A few weeks ago, on the 18th of May to precise I had to part with my darling tram companion..yes, ladies and gentleman, that is my Ipod Nano. You see it was working fine, well it just wasn't mounting so they had to take it in for servicing. My reliancy on this 4GB gadget became apparent when it was taken away from me, a part of me seemingly died with it..well stayed behind with it, and to top it off the man who took my baby away was soo not good with customers, he just took it away didn't say anything except come back on Tuesday and collect it..that just made me even more 'upset', his dehumanized way of handling eveything. I was not impressed at all. So my baby was gone, what was I to do on the tram for the next couple of days..?You see I've become so reliant on it that it goes EVERYWHERE i go, I do not leave the house without it, even if its to go grocery shopping!! I even put my phone on 'meeting' to accomodate for my Inano..that's how much I really love my nano.

Sometimes I think people on the tram think this kid is mad, there I am bopping to my beats on the tram, but little do they know I'm just enjoying this short life of mine, either by listening to Malaika or the Foo Fighters, I am thoroughly enjoying myself!! Steve Jobs definately came thru with the Ipod nano!!

Well, Tuesday came and the collection day came for my baby to come back home..ALAS, I was given a new baby, same colour but all my music was GONE, ok, don't get me wrong, I'm happy that I didn't have to pay anything for the replacement coz of warranty and stuff, but ALL my music was gone, and some of it I cannot get back lah!!
So, that moment in time was bittersweet for me, but hey, I'm back to business..jamming Inano, getting strange glares...but LIVING life and loving it!!

"Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking."
~H. Jackson Browne

Still I Rise...

2006-05-06T22:44:00.000+10:00

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
pumping in my living room.
Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.
Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own backyard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
you may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.
Does my sexiness upset you?
does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?
Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise

-Maya Angelou

I love this Poem by Maya because it always encourages me to rise, no matter what I've gone through in the past,what people have said I still RISE...!!

I carry your Heart...with me!

2006-04-29T12:08:00.000+10:00

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

-E.E Cummings

The Theory

2006-04-26T00:12:00.000+10:00

So the theory is..men need help, as in when they are interested in a particular young lady they will not make the first move, at the fear of being rejected or just not having the courage to say something.

This theory is certainly true and has been revealed to me on numerous occasions by a certain young sir but I have refused the possibility of it. Men, actually needing help to make the first move..yeah RIGHT!! Well today, I finally understood, that the theory is indeed true, but in most cases it will come after the situation has changed!

Zimbabwean and Proud

2006-04-18T15:51:00.000+10:00

You may wonder why, I hold my head up high
Why I walk confidantly
as though no calamity is behind me
Why I have Hope for a country that is in
the realms of Disaster,
Why I want to be, a light shining
in the darkness and bringing prosperity
to my nation,

I am Zimbabwean and Proud
I am Zimbabwean and Proud!!

This is just for Independance day, celebrated on this day April 18th. Although Zimbabwe may be going through tough times right now I have Faith and hope that in time things will change..the challenge is, are we the future generation willing to pick up that mantle, and BE the change that our country so requires?!

Happy Independance day to all the Zimbabweans out there..never forget who you are or where you are From.

Now flies the flag, our nations glory, we live with pride inside our hearts as we all stand to build our nation, this our land, Our Zimbabwe
- Henry Olonga-

One Art -Elizabeth Bishop

2006-04-18T00:58:00.000+10:00

The art of losing isn't hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
places, and names, and where it was you meant
to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or
next-to-last, of three loved houses went.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.

--Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident
the art of losing's not too hard to master
though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster.

An Anthology Of Poems

2006-04-18T00:54:00.000+10:00

From Time to time I will be posting several poems, either by myself of other established authors that I think are to be shared and deserve a space on my blog..hehehe, comments about your interpretation of the poem would be appreciated as well.

Continuall Elevate...

They say, Two is Better than One?

2006-04-17T23:53:00.000+10:00

They say two is better than one, that one cannot stand alone and achieve greatness. For a while this concept has been irrelevant for me, but only recently did it dawn upon me like some 'Spiritus Mundi'. I can to the realization that in all walks of life two, is better than one, and in some instances more than two is far much greater!

The latter of two or more has been evidenced with the increasing number of divestures and investments that are currently underway within Australia and worldwide. An example of a divesture has recently occurred between Southcorp which was one of the biggest producers of wine, infamous due to brands such as Penfolds wine deciding to join the Fosters Group. The Fosters Group currently owns a range of alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverage providers and together they form a large group of companies. This company has further impressed upon me how no one would want to or dare to go against 'The Fosters Group’ as they are seemingly a superpower. Other smaller companies would be an easier target, but not Fosters. Another example exists in the airline industry where you have South African Airways (SAA) recently joining the Star Alliance group of airlines which aim to provide the best service available and if SAA had tried to do it alone, success would be quite hard to attain, where as with them being part of a group of airlines, they become even stronger having a larger market share and increased popularity as part of the prestigious global airline body.

Two is definitely better than one, thinking on the wedding I recently attended, surely Clarence and Francesca are better together than as individuals, they are stronger and can achieve more as when one is weak the other will be stronger, together great legacies will be achieved.

Again, two (or more) is definitely better than one. This is the stuff that great legacies are built on!

What holds you together?

2006-04-17T22:41:00.000+10:00

After watching ‘In Her Shoes’ I find myself asking this question to myself, what holds me together? What makes me in continually tick and continue each and everyday, is it the hope of a better tomorrow? Success in the near future, perfectionism, what people think of me? What is it?

Thinking on this I collated a couple of things of what I think holds me together. Firstly my faith, if I didn’t believe in God I don’t know what or where I would be, even trying to fathom a life without Him seems hard to believe and even think possible. Secondly, my work, right now my school work, I thoroughly enjoy the course I am currently studying although the work that goes with it is extensive, I actually yearn for that adrenaline rush of having to do something, always having to perform, pushing myself to limits I never thought would ever be achievable….thirdly, as evidenced by my reactions to a particular event that recently occurred, where my insecurities popped up again, I realized I am a perfectionist, I aim for it, I try to be it, I want to appear as it (always failing dismally) and when I am not it, I become enveloped by a cloud of disappointment, disappointment at not only myself but also disappointing those who may think of me as perfect, you see the thing is, you never, well I never seem to see myself in the light others see me as. Someone can say something about you (me) and although they may say it you (I) don’t believe it and continually strive to go above and beyond that persons ideology of who (I) you are (am). So in essence you are never completely nor truly secure because you want to continually be that which you probably are not!!

So at the end of the day…what holds you together?? That is the question I pose to you!

-In the hearts of the truly great…perfection is never achieved only endlessly pursued!-

21st Birthday

2006-03-23T18:33:00.000+11:00

Well after my previous post where I was all teary and depressed, my actual birthday was the exact opposite…

The day started off with opening my present at midnight from my sister in Perth. It was a silver chain with ‘21’ which is white cold and has real diamonds..So I’m actually blinging yeyeye, don’t have to wait for the engagement ring to bling now hehehe. Then mukoma jovi started the texts first with a text at nine mins past midnite..come thru the spirit, certainly comin on up!! Then my international birthday greetings started rolling in from France NDH, south Africa bash and mufie, Zimbabwe Momz and Pops, America Rumbidzai, Neo Botswana, then the local birthday greetings started coming in from Australia,Dorica, ‘The Don’, Farzahd ,Daniela, Mai Snare, Rosemary, Miss Theron, Big Sister Fadzai, Wadzi, Ninj, Rungano, Miss Sekete, Matthew, Rufaro, The Cavs, Rujecko, Elsie Hooi, Natalie, Georgina, Ena, Azra, Areti, Chris, Shereen, Ridzwan, Shariffa ,Auntie Tendai, Simba and Mr Manduku. I hope I haven’t left any names out but thanks to everyone, you made the day extra special just by even remembering.

Well before all the birthday greetings I was treated to a lovely breakfast by Pastor John and Rona, Ken and Keira and Devi. That was really special it was such an amazing start to a great day thank you all so very much I really appreciated it!! Then, a long day of school was next as I only finished school at 2030. My Transport Management group showered me with loads of love, Azra even bought these delicious cookies for our meeting which didn’t really materialize but that was ok! Got a card from Ena, that was really special, thanks girl. Afterwards, I met up with Rufaro at Crown Bakery and she treated me hot chocolate and strawberry cheesecake (might I add, the best cheesecake I’ve had so far in Australia), met up with Miss Mushambi Snr as well who showered her birthday greetings as well.

Then, I had my evening lecture, that was very good actually, well Elsie is an excellent lecturer so you will never be bored in her lectures, well I certainly am not!! Well, after she overheard a conversation I was having with Areti and realized it was my birthday didn’t she just put that up on the slides.. ‘HAPPY BIRTHDAY TAT!’ twas quite funny actually.

Lecture ended and Areti and I made our way to the tram stop as we take the same route home. I got off a bit earlier deciding I was not up to making dinner so bought some Chinese takeaway, on arrival at my place, I noticed something very weird, my lights were on, I thought to myself, wow, did I really leave them on when I left? On turning my key, I realized it was not double bolted and I always double bolt my door..trust me. I don’t know why it did not cross my mind that someone else actually has my keys, guess I was really tired. On opening the door who do I find but Miss Theron and ‘The Don’ chillin in my lounge…ah I could have cried, but then, I’m gangsta...hehehe. mann, I was sooooooooo touched that was such a lovely jesture, and they had a card, oh cute!!

Then came an even bigger surprise….didn’t Mukoma Jovi, Double Up and Kundai just come over as well to wish me a Happy Birthday. Then the cake came out, with candles, ahhhhhhhhh that was too cute, the last time I had a cake with candles was in form 1! That was extra extra special, thank you all so very much every single one of you who showed me tremendous love on my 21st birthday. I really appreciated it!! I love you all very much!!

So what started of as a seemingly bad day ended as one of the best days of my life so far, it was sooooooooo amazing! thank you all again!!

I must say being 21, I feel much older now, like there is no turning back, and it makes me ponder what have I achieved in these 7665 days (approximately) that I have lived. What difference have I made or am I making?

Tis the eve 'fore my birthday..

2006-03-22T22:49:00.000+11:00

Greetings all, well in approximately 1 hour, I will have lived 7665 days, how enlighting is that! I find myself though, a bit emotional, I don't know why, considering I've vowed to adapt the quote 'Tears are a Luxury Adaptors must forgo'!
I guess its wishing I could be home with my family especially my mum, I dunno its just this whole turing 21 business, I'm actually growing older and I think to myself what have I achieved, what do I have to show for in this short lifetime I have lived, what would be said of me if I died today?...

I somehow feel all alone, which is not really something different from how I live my ordinary life each day, Hello, I live ALONE so yeah,I am alone obviously but its just the feeling of emptiness, I guess it's just emotions. I feel to some extent disjoined from my peers, etc I dunno I wonder what tomorrow will hold in store for me. The day shall be really full and busy as well. Can't wait to open my first present though from my sister in Perth, wonder what it is..hehehe

Anyway, in all situations in all circumstances..I shall choose Joy!

Werribee Zoo

2006-03-13T23:57:00.000+11:00

This was a very interesting weekend, filled with victories and disagreements but at the end of it all, it was a good one...and we got to shake some future..hehehhe!! The South African Band was absolutely Great!!

Enjoy the pics (the brothers of others can dance Lol)

Mesh, Ona and Double-up

Mmilidzi, Mesh, Ona and Myself

The South African Band

Others were Breakin it DOWN...!!!!!!!

The Holiday In Pictures

2006-03-13T22:58:00.000+11:00

My sincere apologies for the delay in putting this blog up. This is a snippet of my holiday, family and friends! It was absolutely Great!!!!!!!!

La Familia, we spent time just Hanging..having fun etc
Pictures Include Dad's birthday, The Don in H, my lovely cousins

Tazvi and Mati..family from Malawi

Coffee with Vimbai and Dee, the cake was scrumPTIOUS!!

My dashing Nephews

Make Poverty History...

2006-03-05T22:03:00.000+11:00

Make Poverty History.. What does this slogan mean to you? Is it just a fashion statement, something that you wear around your wrist because it's the 'in' thing to be doing?

How are you making poverty History or are you? Are you 'Making poverty History'.

My take on this is I AM Making poverty History, I wonder If you will comprehend what I mean, I Tatenda am the persona of Making Poverty History..this is probably confusing, it's even confusing writing it out but I hope you will comprehend.

I AM what 'Making Poverty History is in person, by coming to Australia, and getting a degree, taking the education that I have attained back to my country and using what I have learnt to advance my country and change the poverty situation there by teaching men/women to fish, instead of handing them fish each day. Along with all the other great men and women that I will be working with, We are and will Make Poverty History because we have the opportunity to come overseas and study in order to make a difference that counts so that many others who may have been unfortunate in previous years have the same opportunity we have had, have the same chance at continually making a difference..and to be Making Poverty History..creating a domino effect which will in turn eradicate poverty from this world!

Like Slavery and apartheid, poverty is not natural. It is man-made and it can be overcome and eradicated by the Actions of Human Beings! -Nelson Mandela

Have you ever..

2006-03-05T21:58:00.000+11:00

Have you ever thought how one moment in time can change you, mold you, shape you? How one careless word, thought or action seems to upset the balance of things till it appears there is no going back! Have you ever thought that things will never be the same after the occurence of one event??

Have you ever...?

The World is Changing..

2006-03-05T21:51:00.000+11:00

Well, to all my fans out there apologies for the delay in updating my blog, I assure you it shall be worth your wait…so this week I finally commenced my long awaited Transport and Logistics Management course at RMIT. I must say the feeling of knowing you made the right choice without any regrets is absolutely out of this world, I cannot explain it (Lah).

Just a brief background late last year I was faced with the decision of pursuing the original plan to do Transport and Logistics or do International Business, the truth is I knew deep in my heart that either way both would be hard work, and a whole lot of dedication and I could very well excel at both but it was such a hard decision to make, but after listening to the wise council that I have been so blessed with Transport and Logistics took the upper hand!! Boy oh boy am I so glad I made that choice because I am Loving it…I love my course, my Uni, my teachers everything….my adrenaline pumps at the thought of going to school and learning all the information I can use to further advance my country….. Yes I am going back home with all this knowledge I am attaining why would I not want to be part of Making Poverty History!! So yeah TnL is absolutely fabulous!! For some students who have no idea what this feels like...call me and I can further elaborate it’s WHOA...WOW..!!

So yeah school as you can guess is going great for me... I learnt so many new things this week regarding TnL and how to improve the transport system in my country regarding infrastructure development and something even more interesting the usage of RFID tags..lettme elaborate for those who may just be a bit baffled by my lingo..

Infrastructure-The facilities that must be in place in order for a country or area to function as an economy and as a state, including the capital needed for transportation, communication, and provision of water and power, and the institutions needed for security, health, and education

For Zimbabwe and Africa as a whole to become successful in the area of transport and logistics and to have an efficient and effective transport network that will encourage investment, trade and transportation we need excellent, outstanding infrastructure ( I must say Botswana is coming up in that arena at present!1 lets go tswana’s!)

RFID- Radio Frequency identification (ID). Refers to the technology that uses devices attached to objects that transmit data to an RFID receiver. An alternative to bar coding. Advantages include data capacity, read/write capability, and no line-of-sight requirements.

RFID tags I found to be sooo amazingly interesting, in essence they are micro chips that are placed lets say on clothing in a factory to insure that workers do not steal when they leave the facility etc, there are so many uses for RFID tags that the list is inexhaustible, but one example (compliments of Elsie) that I found absolutely amazing was the usage of these tags in human beings, I cannot recall the exact country but it was definitely European. Well basically what they are doing in certain hospitals in Europe is injecting these micro chips into people, the chips contain all the medical information and history of the patient, therefore in the event of an accident they just scan the body of the patient and all their medical information comes up, what blood type, allergies etc..isn’t that amazing, surely it would reduce casualties that occur in the medical field because you would not be trying to wake someone up to ask them their medical information!! That I found to be seriously exceptional!

That’s about all that I have about the week so far..But apart from that I cannot wait for what this week has in store..more knowledge to gain, more work to do..but hey work now, play later!!

No more Dodging POPO!!!

2006-02-07T03:38:00.000+11:00

1st February 2006..now that is a day that will go in my history books for years to come, after God only knows, about ten times of trying to get my Licence and failing dismally...I FINALLY GOT MY Licence....yes people I am no longer dodging the Police in zim and pretending like I have a licence when I do not, shuffling in my bag and pretending I have left it at home, taking immaculate detours..whoa it feels soooooooooo weird having the document that i have wanted for so many years, its still unbelievable to me but yeish God always comes Thru!!

If there is anything I have learnt from my continual failures in this endeavour is Persistence, persistence is the key, in all cases in all situations at any cost!!

Thanks especially to my dearest Mother who continually encouraged me to keep trying especially on that day when I did not fell like trying at all, my cousin/instructer Simba, thanks for the faith and my dear brother Mmilidzi for always telling me to Come Thru Girl! I appreciate and love you all!

Goodbye the Beloved Country

2006-02-07T03:14:00.000+11:00

4th February 1330, my plane took of for the down under, namely Australia. I must say I am not overly enthusiatic to be back, if I could have stayed longer I would definately..I love my country, my family everything about Zimbabwe is OFF the chain even though we are suffering economically there is still joy in the suffering we endure, from laughing about our expired money to just enjoying each others company we have a good time...I definately cannot wait till the end of the year and I return.

The past holiday was filled with joy and tears from the time I spent bonding with my cousins till the passing away of our grandmother which was a big blow for the family but a strengthening period as well.

Also i managed to see The Don in two other countries which upped my count to three..yeyeye that was totally off the chain! Gabz was totally cool, apart from the heat and the grief both our families were experiencing we managed to revel in the joy that is found in friendship and life. Gabz I must say is coming on up to be the new Johannessburg..come thru TSWANAS!!I managed to meet the infamous Leungo who I have only heard of and the Divine miss Paula..! We also managed to do a bit of touristy stuff such as visiting the Three Chiefs monument, that was truly surreal in itself. and I also managed to get past Bots Police with my Aussie learners, yeyeye that was off the chain!! Bots infrastructure is truly coming thru guys, driving to GabZ was soo enjoyable and smooth, I felt like I was on a runway all the way!

So in a nutshell, home was truly superb and I will miss it dearly now its back to hard work, which I am excited about and looking forward to because after all a Great holiday awaits me at the end of the Year!!!!!!

The holiday in pictures coming soon..........

A Good Woman.....

2006-02-07T02:52:00.000+11:00

She is the one who stands for her family, a pillar in times of trouble, a confidante who does not divulge what is said in secret. A good woman sees no other man than her own, she enjoys him all her days, a good woman is strong in her faith. And leaves a legacy greater than her own, a lineage, an army to stand strong through good and bad

A good woman is more than Proverbs 31, she goes way Above and beyond that. Her reputation precedes her in all arenas of her lifestyle. She is know as mother and friend protecting her family against any attacks that may arise.

A good woman flew away to heaven on the wings of angels on Saturday 21 January, my grandmother Sithembile Mudariki, the only grandmother I’ve truly known was a good woman. She most certainly left an imprint in the hearts of everybody she came in contact with, from outsiders to family members. She was truly an angel from up above. Even in her last days when cancer ravaged her body she managed to stay strong for the family as she did not want us all to see the pain she was in.

To Gogo I say rest in peace, you were an amazing woman and your legacy will long outlive you……….I will forever carry you in my heart!

‘I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)’ –E.E Cummings

A Thing About Colour

2006-01-07T11:27:00.000+11:00

So, I’ve been thinking after the recent racial uprisings that occurred in Sydney last year and thought, what is this thing about colour? About people being different that you? Why can we not all live together in perfect harmony? We seem to all be afraid of each other and ‘crash’ in order to feel something in terms of ‘power’ or ‘strength’ or ‘superiority?’

I was on a train headed to the city one day, minding my own business, got onto the train and sat next to an old white lady and there was a seat between us and as I sat down she seemed to suddenly clutch her bag even more, like I was going to mug her or something, on the TRAIN! I MEAN hello! How Stupid would that be, there are so many cameras in the train for one and there were enough people on the train. So I questioned myself, why was she scared? What makes me, a black woman, scary? Why fear me?! Hello!?

Why are we not embracing each others cultures? Why do people want be bigger and better than another race? Are we not re-living the days of anti-semitism, killing races off. Not physically but in spirit, breaking them down? Isn’t this world so interestingly been made by the I AM to encompass all peoples of all nations, in harmony to learn together? To live together on one planet without any uprisings?

Think on this…… it starts with you, Be the change you wish to see in the World –Oprah Winfrey

A Good Man?

2006-01-07T11:23:00.000+11:00

First he came with the charming smile, the smooth approach to a ‘faint heart wins no fair lady’, he graduated to being ‘The Man’ in her life bringing her sweet smelling tantalizing gifts for any occasion, just to show he cared, long phone calls that lasted way through the night, and with his firm beliefs she began to believe he was the one, or was it ill-fated love…….?

After the vows were all said and done, the babies came and they were content for a while with the joy a baby brings, then things started changing, he started working late for the family since it was growing, coming home with tell tale signs of another woman, but then she had her babies to love, as this love was unattainable from the man she no longer called a friend. What happened she asks herself? Was she not a good woman who had found her good man? Where had she failed, or had she?

So who is to blame for the decay in covenants that we so love to call marriage? Why do men cheat? I’m sure you will concur with me that the majority of cheaters, especially in Africa are men. What do us women do wrong? Why are we unable to keep our man? Or is not our fault? Looking around myself, there are enough women in Zimbabwean homes who have lost their first love to either the economic hardships and the stresses of married life which lead him to another woman, suggestively more comforting that he forgets the woman of his youth and no longer enjoys her but has other exploits. Why is it these women stay? Seriously? Is it for the kids, to save face, what is it that makes a woman stay through all the pain when she knows this man no longer loves, cares or adores her as he used to?

Is there hope for us eligible bachelorettes to find a good man, a man who will not stray, love you though all situations and walk with you through your life, being your friend till the end. I do not wish to say all hope is gone but it kinda looks like a frail candle in the wind.

But in the end we Trust and Wait……for a Good Man!

Zim is Comin Thru

2006-01-06T09:01:00.000+11:00

So today I went to get my Id, I was kinda dreadin it coz you know them prison pictures just aint working for my rep, You know what I'm sayin, but the technology up in this Joint is OFF THE CHAIN! Maiiiiiweeee serious I didn't know my country was ahead like this!

They have these new id's right that everyone has to get and they like take your pic with a digi cam, then they scan your prints on this infra-red item which brings up your prints on their comp, for records or something, then finally you sign your signature on this like mouse kama item, yeish I walked out there thinking mannn Tiri pamberi (we are ahead) most definately! Yeah so I got my NASTY ASSS, metal id, where I look like a bandit and I AM leaving it at home so don't nobody ask to see it and I'll bring the new item which is affliated with all this technology that I have just mentioned!

Nehoo, in the arvo we went Kumush i.e the rural areas with my pops and zakis, yeish the lighties can RAP GWANS!we talked about movies and music, the best movies of 2005, it was cute, they were so much fun!

On the way back I just realised how amazingly beautiful this country is, seriously, when I survey the vast plains, the Luscious foliage, the equatorial green grass and extensive woodlands I know Zimbabwe is a great and vast country. Even with all the problems, I know it shall rise and I will not give up hope nor faint in this day of adversity for this is My Home, My motherland and truly, there is nowhere else I would rather be!

Leadership

2006-01-06T07:59:00.000+11:00

Leadership…………….

I’ve been looking around of late and scrutinizing situations especially being back home and all and I’ve come across the lack of leadership in my country and mind you this is not just a political stance, in all areas and spheres of business. Why is there this shortage I ask myself? Or is there a shortage or are people afraid of having someone excel better than them? Seriously why would one want to not leave a legacy behind!? Your company dies with you? Your ideas, your goals are all dissolved with the end of your life?

Understandably with the economic climate in Zimbabwe and the uprising levels of poverty in the nation yeah, why would you train someone up so they can just steal from you and take all your hard earned work, but surely you have even your children at the least, when they are home for the holidays just showing them the a thing or two of the business is beneficial…. Another factor may also be accredited to lack of knowledge about leadership it has been said ‘ people perish due to lack of knowledge’ and in this case I must most certainly agree not many people have an understanding of why leadership needs to be passed on to those younger, why it is necessary to raise up future leaders of tomorrow. Future (as we say in Zimbabwe) ‘indigenous’ people i.e. entrepreneurs.

I will not be just pessimistic and say this is not the case in all arenas, but it is only present in a few institutions eg my mother is training me up in her business it may be a BIT bugging waking up early, going to the airport, buying flowers going to the bank etc, but I am learning and should she one day be unable to continue, I know where to start from. Big ups to De Momza! I believe such practices by others as well will cause a domino effect in the way Zimbabwe and Africa rises up again in all spheres of influence!

Think on this…… ‘And these things that you have heard from me among many witnesses, commit these to faithful men who will be able to teach others also –Paul’

Greetings from Mother Africa

2006-01-04T05:48:00.000+11:00

HELLO ma peoples..how art thou. A belated Christmas and New Year hope you all entered it well as ChAmpions going the Extra Miles for 2006!

Home has been good. The shock of spending millions of dollars on commodities is over and I can safely say I have gotten used to the way things are, at the end of the day 'You just learn to deal!'

So Christmas was the usual for me famila except that the gig/dinner was at our house and not at my dads brothers cabin. Yeah, so we did the usual, ate, ate and we were Very merry indeed it was soo much fun just having fun with family and enjoying all the gwans that come with it! Eish and people definately kept on walking I didn't know there were 4 types of Johnnies, Red,Black,Blue and Green, c'est tres interessant! Boxing day, everyone came back to our cabin to have the food from the previous nite, as it obviously was not finished!

I cannot recall the exact day but the brother of others came to Zimboland...yeish I've seen the Don in Two countries now, hopefully it will be two just now! It was great having Lidzi over (btw Momz Absoultely adores you, I was a bit jealous the attention wasn't me..hehehe) Yeah, my momz loves this boy, but then again, what's not to love he is a comin thru Brother!

New Years Eve was a WHOLE other day, my grandmother is not well so she was quite sick in the hours leading up to 2006 but she pulled through by God's grace and she's staying strong!In the evening I had to take my zakis to the GIG, I will not devulge the name of the infamous hosts but it was WHACK!!!!!!!!!!WHACK, WHACK, a waste of half a mill, seriously I did not enjoy it and truly I concur wholeheartedly when people say Zimbos just wind it and grind it! Man, I cannot believe I went I should have just stayed home and slept! Ah well..I guess I know next year to go to the coloured gigs!

So I guess that is New Years and Christmas in a nutshell and as you can see others enjoyed the above mentioned events!

Off to the Motherland

2005-12-19T09:44:00.000+11:00

Hello to all my peoples, this is going to be short, I'm actually at Sydney Airport ready to get my flight home to The Motherland.

Just wanted to say Adieu, Farewell to all my peoples! If I didn't say bye to you, I'm sorry, the last few days have been real busy. I sHALL definately be blogging at home...so watch this space. Nehoo have a Great Christmas and A Happy New Year....Love you all....see you soon. Mwah!

I Got MeSelF An EDumAcaTioN

2005-12-15T22:01:00.000+11:00

So the day finally arrived...yesterday was the day, 14th December 2005, finally arrived yeyeye, I got meself an Edumaction, Yes ladies and gents last night was the night all parents wait and yearn for ,yes, last night I graduated, as you can see from my advanced Diploma in International Trade. Twas a Steller night I must say, everything was spectacular for the rotating stage, the sound, the music, the lighting, the speeches, the AWARDS, everything was superb.....ooooh not to forget the FREE food! RMIT came through fo sho, its was the best, I absolutely loved it!

So thanks go out to first and primarily, My Lord and Saviour for helping along this journey I would not have attained any of the achievements that I achieved without You, so I thank you from the Depth of my Heart! Secondly my parents for supporting me in every single endeavour, throught my confusion, disappointments, everything thank you. Me familia from Every Nation Melbourne, namely The Don, Miss Kobue, you two have been my pillars of support in everything I have endured in these past two years, encouraging me to continue against all odds, you were there, in the highs, you celebrated with me, and in the lows you cried with me, so I thank you! To all the great staff at RMIT who dealt with my never ending questions in Lectures, thank you, I appreciated all your help and advice throughout the two years. To everyone who has been a part of life in Melbourne so far, encouraging me, helping me, boosting up my faith...I thank you from the depth of my heart! You are Simply the Best! Be blessed...........and Continually Elevate...!

Update

2005-12-14T00:47:00.000+11:00

So it’s been a long time since I updated, sorry to everyone who is a regular viewer, ma bad. So not much has been up just been busy working, working, working and more working…… preparing for the familia to come over. But yeah they are here now, today is the BIG DAY! I finally got an outfit yesterday! Hooray, tis been a long journey especially with the ‘gypsy extravaganza’ that has taken over ALL THE FASHION streets of Melbourne, mannn twas buggin, anyway finally found the perfect outfit!

So the familia being here all they wanna do is shop, shop, shop and More shopping and that is what we have been doing, mann I’m buggered, so I need to sleep but I thought it would be best I update seeing as I haven’t done that in AGES! After tomorrow the countdown is on….4 DAYS and I am back to the Beloved Motherland, can hardly wait.

Isn’t it amazing how time is ‘fleeting as the wind’!

Back to the Motherland

2005-12-03T01:04:00.000+11:00

Yesterday was a great day of thanksgiving and sadness…the Don, Don Lidzi flew off to Botswana; yes he has officially left the country for those who are unaware. Yes, my big brother has gone to the Motherland which I so long to got to, but it is great that he has gone, he really needs to do his placement and rest hard, coz this young distinguished Sir has worked tres hard all semester to attain the grades he has attained. He came thru and I am more than proud of him! I’ve never truly seen you this happy and excited, mann you were dancing, smiling from ear to ear, yeyeye, wow twas new for me, but hey you definitely had something to Praise Jah for ..He came THRU, Praise to Him always.

I’m gonna miss you bra, but hey you’ll be back soon and I guess it’s kinda training that we all won’t be together for a long time and soon we shall have to go our own separate ways only congregating for business deals and weekend escapades with the families to either Bots or Zim.

I am sooooooooo excited about what is in store for the future and what God wants to do with our Beloved Africa.

Continually Elevate Young sir and have a Great Journey! Love ya

The Value of A life

2005-12-03T00:45:00.000+11:00

So, another day has passed, but yesterday was unlike any other. Yesterday saw the passing away of a life, a life that many cared for, looked up to and cherished. So with the passing of a life based on the circumstances that were prominent it has caused me think and pose a question to you my fellow bloggers or those willing to pass on their opinions of what occurred.

If you are unaware of the happenings of December 2nd, 2005 you have only but to turn on Australian Tv news and it was on all channels, yes it was the death of convicted Australian drug smuggler Van Nguyen.

So the question I pose to you is does a country actually have the right to take a life? What gives them the sovereign right to do so? Is it because they are an independent state? Is it because many others have been executed previously and the country cannot be seen to take a stance of leniency on a foreigner? Yes, I will agree with you, death for smuggling drugs is harsh, mannn a life taken away ‘just for struggling drugs’ is deep I must admit, but then who is to say that the drugs which were to be trafficked would not kill more lives than one, yes definitely a life is valuable, but is it not a give and take situation? And the people buying the drugs have a choice, but then are you not providing for that choice. Maybe it’s the need of the rat race and Darwin’s theory of ‘only the strongest survive’.You have to make a choice.

Also, surely if you know that the penalty is death for doing something, why does one follow through with it? I must admit I have no idea of all the details regarding why he did it but could there not have been another way out apart from trafficking drugs through Singapore to pay off a debt? Are there not other means to settle debts? Maybe, there was that ‘taking a risk’ factor which I guess every human being aches for, the possibility of ‘not being caught’, hey I must admit I have done it…just a little recall of the past in high school we were not permitted to have cell phones, and yes a large number of us sixth formers and juniors alike smuggled the rare commodities into school, with the hope of never being caught, although there was a risk, we took it and hoped not to be caught, so I guess I can relate in that aspect, but that is just a perspective.

Are in essence a number of Australian’s ( I will not generalize and say all Australians) always thinking that Australian law surpasses that of the countries they travel to. Surely not, what is law in one country is not law in the other. Take Saudi Arabia for example, everyone knows that if you dress inappropriately (especially women) you may be subject to whippings by religious police, so now if you knew the law before can you say well, Australia needs to help me out on this one? I think not. I think people need to take responsibility for their actions and not want the government to bail them out. It brings about a dependency on your government which I believe in some cases is too much.

Also, fair and fine Singapore has such a harsh death penalty, even the fact that they have a death penalty is appaling to some people but what about countries such as the United States which recently executed their 999th person this past week, how come no one has taken a stance on this superpower and said it is wrong, only when Singapore does it, it is wrong. I must commend the Singaporean prime minister who said ‘if we execute our own, why not foreigners?’...That in essence represented the impartiality stance the country takes. Why should they take a different stance now that someone is ‘ Australian’ what does the government say then to the grieving families of others who have been previously executed, ‘sorry?’ do you think this would suffice the heartache and pain the mothers of those other prisoners feel?

So then, my conclusion is I stand divided in whether this was right or wrong. But at the end of the day, Law is Law as- quoted by The Donnette. I sit on the fence just like all of Australia going 50-50 on this case. The law prevailed today although it was harsh, it had to be done.

May the souls of those dearly departed rest in Peace. Let us never underestimate the Value of a Life.

A Way of Life

2005-11-23T00:24:00.000+11:00

The anticipation, the wait for the day to come, when the date approaches you slowly but surely start becoming uncomfortable and wish it could just come and you could get this OVER and done with..but then it finally comes and you wish you had not wished it to come because the pain that follows, only nurofen and try help, mann from the back, the tummy, every part of you aches and you pray, oh Father please help me coz ‘I can’t stand the pain’! ..this is the pain, gentleman of the lost pregnancy.

This is the crimson tide, the curse of Eve, that which comes upon millions of women around the world everyday, well, hopefully unless they have been naughty, are taking medicinal for the pain or are on a nine month leave of absence preparing for their agony to follow. This medical phenomenon makes woman who she is physically, apart from the many differences men and women have, this is one of the major ones, this tide approaches stealthily, creeping on you unexpectedly and u suddenly know your day will not be very good..your week the next couple of days will be ravaged (made up of) pain, discomfort and discomfort from watching what you wear, to making sure you have the right accessories, a handbag, my gosh,,tis out of this world mate.

And then after a few days, it’s gone and we are back to some sort of normality, the presence of calm....until the next tide comes about!

This is the CrimSON Tide……….a way of life!

MelBourNe ZoO

2005-11-22T23:27:00.000+11:00

I Never thought I would go to a zoo would come, seriously where is the fun in going to see animals caged up? Well except the ones that need to be locked up i.e the reptiles. This trip was very different from other wildlife expeditions I had previously made and quit enlightening especially watching little children such as Nathan get soooo excited about seeing aminals, mann the innocence of a child that was quite surreal in itself. I think sometimes we tend to just let life pass us by and not enjoy the tiny, precious moments that we have, just like a small child who even takes great excitement in watching monkeys swing from branch to branch or a gorilla shaking in chest like 'I am king kong' hehehehe.

Yeah, so the trip was quite interesting actually infact indeed. I saw animals that I had never seen before apart from discovery channel such as a koala ( and I even got to stroke it, yes black people I touched a koala), a tiger,a gorilla, an indian elephant, loads of monkey [ i seriously never knew there were so many monkey types]. I even got to go on a fairground circus ride, that was kinda cul, i felt all young again (lol. And I also got to spend time with family which was great as well. Twas a good day. Seeing the king of the jungle kinda made me homesick tho, I really wanna go back to the Motherland, but hey this too shall pass...

Diary Of A MaD Black WOMan!

2005-11-18T18:08:00.000+11:00

This is a an analysis of themes represented in Diary of a Mad Black Woman. If you have not watched this movie yet, it is definately a Must!

Plot Summary

Helen McCarter has everything a woman wants: a nice house and rich husband. However after her husband Charles throws her out of the house after admitting to an affair a distraught Helen turns to her mother, grandmother Madea and cousin Brian who take her in and turn back to God. Helen learns for the first time in her life to stand up on her two feet and is ready to remove herself from her relationship with Charles and move on with Orlando. But when her husband is almost killed by a vengeful client, Helen wonders if she has the heart to forgive him despite everything.

1. Success

Brethren you have heard it said; 'The Love of money is the root of all evil'
Let us not forget where we came from. Charles (Steve Harris), Helen's husband had his whole life based on making money and he always knew he would be successful, just like many of us know in our early years. But what happened was his Love for money (notice I say LOVE) led to the evil which engulfed him and on which this movie is based. He was adulteruous, dragged the woman who was there every step on his road to success out of the house they had built together like a tramp, a nobody, the lowest creature ever made, without even caring one bit!

Another thing is 'Brenda' his mistress said nothing when Helen was dragged out of the house, she just stood there and watched and said nothing! Even jeering that 'Helen' was a 'tired begging sister'..how deep is that. This scene in the movie is one of the worst in the movie. There was a lot of Pain right thurr.

Lesson Learnt...You will reap what you sow.

2. Strength - A Strong Black Woman

Infact woman, wherever she is from who has experienced so much from a man be it Pain, Hurt, a broken Heart because this man was 'her all, her everything' as women love harder than men..or do they?

Helen learns the need for strength to find herself and this is highlighted when she visits her mother a Wise Proverbs 31 Woman ( Who even The Don would marry) who says 'Jesus is Your ALl, Your Everything'

Strength is the Courage Helen needs to go on.

3. Forgiveness

'The Hope in Believing that the Past could be Indifferent'-OW

Man, this is a hard one, which all mortals find hard to comprehend and act upon. Does forgiveness mean it's ok that they hurt you? Or is it for your benefit, so you can be free; not chained anymore?

This time the most hilarious character of the movie, Madea (another crazed black woman) who highlights to Helen that she has not forgiven Charles for all that he did to her as she most probably has been inflicting pain on Charles revelling in the opportunity to finally hurt him when he is recouperating from being shot at. Helen finds that to move on she Really needs to 'let go'.

When Charles says 'I am sorry' this further prompts Helen to forgive Charles for all the pain that he has caused her...She is Finally a Free WOMAN!

Bitterness - This is something women have to constantly deal with and a theme in the movie highlights the anger and bitterness Helen now feels toward all men because of what Charles did to her.

'Now every man that you meet will have to pay for what He did!'

This quote from the movie resounds true, ladies we will not give another Comin Thru brother the benefit of the doubt and cut him some slack due to 'the first cut being the deepest right', it is true that No faint heart wins no fair lady but maybe sometimes we are a bit too harsh, because we've been hurt. We now don't believe in 'fairy tales or knights in shining armour' due to One man..ladies C'mon..Let's give the brothers a break and cut them some slack..although not too much..remember in all cases to 'Guard your heart, for from it flow the Issues of Life'!

4. Love -The perfect definition of what love is..

I Corinthians 1 v 1-13 ; Love is patient, kind, does not keep a record of wrongs, love never fails and Love is the Greatest Thing!

Being able to love someone apart from all their shortcomings is deep, and this is seen throught Love triumphing above all things especially between Brian and his wife who has a drug addiction.

Love can also make ' a mad black woman' namely Helen move on again and not compare all men to Charles..the love she finds is in a good man, namely Orlando..(Shemar Moore) who Prays for her harder than he does himself, loves the way she smiles, basically the brother got lyrics. (i'm sure you get the picture!)

Overall this movie is a must see, really deep and inspritational..I thoroughly enjoyed it!

Sincere Apologies

2005-11-18T13:20:00.000+11:00

To everyone who actually reads my blog, my sincere apologies for the retake to My, My how we grow, it was so that I could add the photos that went with that and it didn't graft. So there it is again, sorry, I'm having serious technical difficulties. If you can help, please do, even my c-box is not appearing on my page. For those who wrote comments on that particular blog namely Shereen, my apologies again they are gone so if you wish to post another comment please do!

Continually elevate.....

My, My how we Grow...retake

2005-11-18T13:10:00.000+11:00

Well yesterday I finished International Trade….and officially on the 14th of December 2005! It seems like just yesterday that I was concerned how 2 years would take FOREVER but time is fleeting just like the wind…..seriously 2003 I finished upper six in the Pink Prison…beloved Arundel..oh rest in peace (lol) yeah the all girls school in which I was constricted in for six years was no longer what made me, I had to find me, MY identity and could no longer just say I’m an Arundel girl, I had to be Tatenda …whoa it’s funny how we place so much emphasis on the little things in this life,

The last two years of Arundel were just competition after competition, being in the elite clubs, being head of hostel all them badges we (I) collected, for what? Now I don’t even know where any of them are! What was it all for I wonder? I guess probably the sense of holding onto achievement and what others thought about all our exploits. From the cream blazers depicting academic colors to the striped brown blazers, they all represented some sort of achievement that we had made someone proud, our school our parents, hopefully ourselves! Now it has all faded away just as that final year when I left Arundel NEVER to return again…yes black people not even for the quadrangle sixth form teas!

So having finished International trade and going on to Transport and Logistics I’m really excited probably at the aspect that I’m finally getting to do what I came to beloved Australia for, I must say apart from the work we put in for assignments and all, it was actually a great experience, I met so many people, have made great relationships with colleagues and teachers, yes even teachers! How many uni students can actually say they have a relationship with their teachers! My International Trade teachers are the best (I LOVE RMIT) and I will never forget them, they have left an imprint on my heart for many years to come. They encouraged us to look beyond the stereotype placed behind having a degree and actually doing Tafe, how that gives you another career edge!

My gratitude goes out to all those teachers, namely Kylie Paterson-Jonas, an amazing woman who helped me with so many assignments, who said it was ok to be asking so many questions in class, coz at the end of the day that what gets you the high marks you are aiming for…Kylie you are definitely the best and be rest assured I will be coming to you for help with T&L assignments. You are like one of those 1st grade teachers who consistently encourage you that ‘Winners never quit and Quitters never Win’, you will always have an imprint on my heart!

And of course not forgetting Pirium….and Team Winfrey Jemima, Natalie, Sema and Edmond, we have had many success ladies and gentleman, being named the best group that teachers have seen since Kylie was at school is a major achievement and we did good, our team dynamics I must say were off the chain and we all were leaders in our own way and to everyone I know you will definitely make it in ALL that you endeavour to do for the future! Always remember:

True Passion, Forgets Fear, Overcomes Fatigue and Triumphs over all difficulties!

That is my life’s motto and all Honor and Glory to The ChessMaster, God, YOU have come thru for me….and I leave International Trade at present ( the results aren't out yet)with 11 Higher Distinctions! CTG (Come Thru God!)

ThE UpSidE of AnGeR?

2005-11-16T22:25:00.000+11:00

Is it real though, the Theory. Anger can Change You, Mold You and Shape you into something you're not.....

The Only UPsIDE to anger then is the person you become. Hopefully someone that wakes one day and realises they are not afraid of it journey...
Someone that knows that the truth is at best, a partially told story. That Anger, like Growth comes in Spurts and fits and in its wake leaves a New Chance at Acceptance and the Promise of CaLm!

Then Again what do I know?..i'm only young

Metamorphosis……………….

2005-11-05T19:12:00.000+11:00

The change in Moi!

Well, if most you haven’t noticed there has been a change in me for the past month…time to grow has definitely come on my Turf. For many years I have been boxed up, caged unable to Fly, Soar high above into whom I am meant to be…I don’t when it actually occurred but it dawned on me like some ‘spiritus mundi’. Yes ladies, gentleman, boys and girls..this young lady has finally come to love herself. I AM Wonderfully….. and fearfully made! And for the first time those words have meaning, they are true to me, the ChessMaSTER has definitely made a much needed move one me!

So ladies for all you out there maybe living in the Enclosure that I have restricted myself to for 2O WHOLE YEARS…you can be FREE...Free to be who you are meant to be, who the ChessMaster..your King wants you to be! You are a Princess and Never forget that…so amazing! You are Free to Fly, To soar, to Be EmpoweRED!

And you know what the Best thing of it all is You don’t need some BroTHA knocking on your door to Validate your beauty! That’s what I love if anything about this validation that I have found in My Creator. You, Yes You reading this are a Phenomenal Woman..Yes woman PhenOMEnally that’s you..whether you have Big voluptuous curves, whether you are petite, chocolate, caramela or vanilla in You are Phenomenal…!

PHENOMENAL WOMAN
by Maya Angelou

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies
I'm not cute or built to suit a model's fashion size
But when I start to tell them
They think I'm telling lies.
I say
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips
The stride of my steps
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please
And to a man
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees
Then they swarm around me
A hive of honey bees.
I say
It's the fire in my eyes
And the flash of my teeth
The swing of my waist
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say
It's in the arch of my back
The sun of my smile
The ride of my breasts
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say
It's in the click of my heels
The bend of my hair
The palm of my hand
The need for my care.
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

So Swiftly, so suddenly

2005-10-29T08:48:00.000+10:00

A day that started like any other
clear blue skies..
such optimism, hope
How does it become so cloudy
fading away like the distant sunset
How does a life
end so abruptly
jUst like that...?
Just as the day began,
and now fades away...
so does a life
The memories
that you have of that life seemingly
all you have to hold onto
why God gives and takes away
that shall remain a mystery,
All I know is at the end of the day is..
You still Are God!

[22nd October]

So it's a week today since Pastor Beto passed away, yeyeye that is just deep in itself. I guess we all learn to deal, cope in some way or another. You think back on all the times you had with this Great man of God and man you cherish all those memories. For me the past week has been hard in some instances because I, in my mortal comprehension could not understand why? Why now, why Pastor Beto, I mean him and Holly were expecting another boy, he was so young, they've got two toddlers, they announced they were off to further advance the Kingdom in Albury-Wodonga. I just didn't get why God had done this, and in some cases I found myself starting to blame the devil and say 'oh he knew just how great the new Church Plant was to be, so yeah he just took Pastor Beto away so suddenly to try hinder God's will' , obviously that was a wrong state of mind , yeyeye always quick to blame the devil.

Now I know I babbled on about things way beyond my comprehension...things unexplainable to be but certainly the will of the ChessMaster...He moved a piece that was certainly unprecedented and that came as a shock to myself and many others.
I failed to Trust Him and know that His will is being Done on Earth as it is in Heaven. God made the Move and it was the right one, you see we can't predict His move,in this day and age we always want to plan and KNOW what is going to happen, but that is not the life we are meant to live especially those that are His kinder.

So Daddy to you, I'm sorry it was my lack of Trust in You that you would make all things right and well in the souls of everyone who was hurting, yes we do hurt, but we know we have a greater Victory. Pastor Beto is definately in Heaven no doubt and He's just home. Yes, it's not about quantity people, we all say ah he was so young but God is all about Quality. Pastor Beto Lived a life of Quality...and although we miss him he's jus home with Daddy having a blast and contesting for us down here. He had finished all that Daddy had wanted him to do so far as revealed by the fulfilment of all his prophesies, and God is Holding Holly and the boys so closely, making them stronger than ever and taking them through this...His angel is definalely holding them!

'My eye is not on the Fog
But on God that controls Every circumstance
...of Life -George Mueller'

2005-10-29T08:42:00.000+10:00

every breath you take....be Thankful
every moment you spend -cherish it
every morning.....noontime, evening
For Today may be your last
Your Last Breath,
Your Last smile
Your Last memory,

Your Last day!

Live for Today....
Today Matters
Prepare for the hope of seeing a Tomorrow
Live each day in Fullest Abundance
and marvel at the Day ,
well lived....

[23rd Ocotber 2005]

R.I.P Pastor Beto ,You lived a full life!

Long Wait

2005-10-21T21:57:00.000+10:00

Well, the day Finally came...20 WHOLE YEARS of always being second, third (i wish) 24th etc..the day finally came....I didn't actually realise what this would actually mean infact indeed, to feel the emotion that i felt was too deep for words and for comprehension by anyone who hasn't endured the 20 years I have...man it's been hard! yeyeye...is all i can say.

So the long wait is...drummroll..... I tatenda, tSitsi Mudariki actually came 1st in my class for Undertake ContractuaL Negotiations for the Supply of Goods...aka Purchasing. 'tis a logisitics subject people! so yeah i came first with 93% to be precise, man I have NEVER EVER been in this position my whole life ...eish all things are really possible..i'm not dumb ass after all..nah jus playin but yeah this is really Great! Thanks to Daddy, King for helping me to continually perservere...i guess you knew the time was comin soon and i just had to continue pressing onwards...Christian solidier!

So yeah...it's been a long wait...but my is it WORTHIT!

The sweet taste of Success...today I have felt it! wow!

Always Expecting More.....

2005-10-20T20:40:00.000+10:00

Now this blog is for people who actually read my Iron-butterfly moments. It will be interesting to hear what you think, if you do actually think anything to what I am about to say..
so here goes

Is it sucha bad thing wanting more out of life? Things, a partner, yourself? Some may say..'tis only a chasing after the wind'....what if you never get it? Well my question is what if you are SETTLING for 2nd best, what then? Settling for 2nd best of who you are? what you are meant to be?.....a little insight, I'm not where I used to be, but I'm not whre I want to be...'Superstar they say...-Don Lidzi' but to me I do not measure up. Sure there are some fine qualities here and there, but I'm not half the woman I need to be...i don't quite hit that mark, that target yet. Question is will I ever?

A partner, a mate...yes many have come my way or should i say I theirs. But they all don't seem to measure up to what I really want, or better yet what I deserve ( that should raise a few eyebrows) Is that snobbish, stuck up? Why shouldn't I get the best? A man who I can contend with...emotionally, spiritually, visually, an entrepreneur, a deep thinker..the list goes on and should i devulge it all on this blog i'm sure contenders will try make some moves.But they will never seem to offer ALL I want...so again I question..

Is it wrong to want more?

The Greatest Thing....

2005-10-20T20:34:00.001+10:00

Is it wrong to love
because you have to?
Because it is the means to your end, to not?
Surely, it is said
One sin is not greater than another..
but I cannot erase this
this sin, that has separated
Husband and Wife, father and daughter
Is it a matter of choice, ethics or law?

Why love when you have been hurt..
Leaving a gaping hole
exposed once again...

19th October 2005 [thoughts on life-bus ride]

Broken........

2005-10-20T20:25:00.000+10:00

When does a little girl
become a woman?
Is it when she realises
the world is not going to change?
Unless she becomes the change she wants to see?
is it when she decides to let go
of pain, hurt, frustration...anger
When she realises her father is a man...after all
When she understands not all men are the same?
When does this great event ever occur
........or does it ever?
And she remains..
not a girl...not yet a woman!

19th October, 2005 [bus ride thoughts]